Into the Wild

People tend to get polarized when it comes to fur. To wear, or not to wear- that seems to be the question. But these days it’s getting easier and easier to go Grey Gardens glam without becoming Cruella Deville.

Case in point, monkey fur. I must say I’m enamored with this savage trend that has been popping up on groovy young things from LA to London. I find the wild child look simultaneously badass and super-chic, especially paired with opaque tights and a black miniskirt, a la Kate Bosworth at, where else, the Fendi show in China against the backdrop of the Great Wall, yes, that Great Wall.




To cement this obsession, I even ordered a faux version for a mere 30 pounds on Topshop.com (my secret weapon when it comes to all things trendy). I must admit, I’m a bit apprehensive on whether I’ll end up resembling perennial trendsetter Kate Moss, or more like a Maltese that spent one too many days traipsing about a dirty city block. But what is fashion if it means not taking risks!

Final Word: In today’s modern world of endless synthetic choices, it’s silly to sacrifice another being in the name of something so frivolous as fashion, but if no animals were hurt in the process- long live frivolity!

Mama's Got Brand New...Booty Shorts?

There used to be a time when mothers were known as the ultimate nurturers, beacons of light to look up to for comfort and appropriate decorum. But today, in a world where Dina Lohans, Lynn Spears and Kathy Hiltons run rampant (and get a solid chunk in this month's Vanity Fair), where is the point of reference?

It seems this lack of sophistication has trickled down to (gasp) the upper echelon of New York society where ladies of a certain age feel they can partake in the gutter-glam revelry as well. Not one to forego fashion for formality, we understand these comfortable cougars must make their style statement, but at least it used to be in good taste (Read: Bill Blass, not T-Bags.)

Here social butterfly Helen Schifter personifes the trend to a tee. Even the chic combination of navy and black is undercut by the so-tight-it-makes-me-feel-uncomfortably-violated bicycle shorts and thigh highs socks. What could she have been thinking, one might ask? If sexy was the look, why not go for a chic and faddish pantsuit a la my own mother at a recent benefit, who looked pert and sophisticated in a silk Chloe number and a deftly styled Oscar de la Renta blazer hung over her shoulders.

Perhaps it's a matter of taste or simply a reflection of our growingly garish culture. Still, although we are loathe to the concept of Fashion Police, after all, I've owned quite a few ensembles found on the latter pages of US Weekly, this crime is simply not debatable.

Final Word: Mothers around the world, please step your game up at least for your daughters' sake...or take a cue from mine a get yourself a Chloe pantsuit.

Scenedigging 101

Every now and then my girlfriends and I find that the English vocabulary fails to serve us when it comes to discussing the trials and tribulations of our lives. Thus, we resort to creating a new terminology.

For example, “groovies” was born a few years back when trying to describe the phenomenon of girls chasing and bedding celebrity DJs across the nation in exchange for a couple minutes of booth time at a hot club. Then there was “BBM”, a useful acronym for the ever-agonizing Blackberry Messenger.

But the latest moniker of note comes from our most recent experiences which have provided enough douchebags to cover VH1 producers with the cast of I Love New York III. In fact, the douchebag factor was so high that it merited its own word: scenediggers.

The definition of a scenedigger is one who essentially latches himself onto a girl who has more going on than he does in order to gain higher social visibility. You’ve seen these dudes – Brandon Davis, Brody Jenner, Jason Wahler, Frankie Whatever-The-Fuck-His-Name-Is from The Hills, or K-Fed, the patron saint of scenediggers.

Girls take warning. Before you know it, they’re crawling on your backs at the velvet rope, ingratiating themselves with your already-happening friends, and up your ass high enough to get to the next notch of that never-ending social ladder. But don’t fret, we have some crucial clues on how to spot them before they’re uploading your pics onto their “Party Like A Rock Star IV” Facebook album.

1) They name drop. A lot.
2) Their favorite eateries are STK, Cipriani Downtown, and Nello Summerime.
3) If you meet them it will be at either Tenjune, Gold Bar or some hotspot (most likely at the door, since they can’t get in on their own).
4) Wardrobe staples include: deep v-necks, vests and “man-minas” (the male pashmina).
5) They reference D-list celebrities by their first names and say things like “No, they’re actually pretty cool.”

Final Word: In a cultural climate where scenediggers flourish and real men are nowhere to be found, you never know when your next encounter might be. But take our word of advice, if you do meet an S.D., run. We mean it, run

What Carbon Footprint?

These days it’s hard not to go green. It seems car companies, supermarkets, Oprah, are all giving us a newer and cooler alternative to live in a socially conscious and eco-aware existence. So when a new stylish and safe commodity sprouts up before our eyes, they all but fly off shelves. (Hour-long waits for “I’m Not a Plastic Bag,” anyone?)

The latest (or coolest) enviro-invention comes from cult French label WWP & PAS. A ridiculously soft eco-friendly t-shirt reading “Smells Like Green Spirit” – the tog conveniently encapsulates the grunge spirit of the 90s with the giveback spirit of this millennium. Plus 5% of all the proceeds go to the Green Cross France.

Final Word: Why not step up and wear your care on your sleeve, or chest in this case. Available at www.colette.fr.

Stella's Still Keepin' Busy

We’re huge Stella McCartney fans so don’t take this the wrong way, but Stella for H&M, Stella for Adidas, and now Stella for LeSportsac….she really pimps it!

To her credit, all of her collaborations have been both creatively and commercially successful, so we can understand why she keeps cranking them out.

Today Stella debuted her limited-edition 17-piece collection for LeSportsac, styles include camera and computer cases, hobos and 26” check-in luggage, just to name a few.

As expected from the socially and environmentally-responsible designer, the entire line is “eco-friendly’—all fabrics, hangtags and packaging are created from 100% recycled materials.

"Stella designed this with her lifestyle in mind, so these are really the items that she and her friends would carry when they travel," says a spokeswoman for LeSportsac.

Final Word: Prices range from $98-$475, styles hit stores in January.

Far Out

When I think of tie-dye several visuals immediately come to mind; Hypercolor, The Grateful Dead, and that bearded hippie guy who recently won Survivor. And while tie-dye is as much an American fashion staple as blue jeans, it has never been—in my mind at least—synonymous with high fashion.

But after last spring’s vibrant monochromatic color blocks of lapis, fuchsia and emerald, designers are now happily marrying a muted palette of beige, navy and black to create a multi-tonal sophistication appropriate for the chicest of designs.
This tie-dye may have nothing to do with rubber bands nor will it stain your hands, but the trend is still accessible to all. Both high fashion and low have attached themselves to look, peep-toe shoe by Prada and scarf by Zara pictured here.

Final Word: Former hippies rejoice! Fashion equality for all.

Someone Call a (Real) Doctor

We were super excited for the October 30th return of Nip/Tuck, until we saw this.

Poor Joley Richardson. She was never my favorite, but I wouldn’t wish this Rachel Zoe make-under on even my worst enemies.

I’m sure those clever N/T writers will have no trouble working her emaciated frame into the script. They’ll just blame the weight loss on her character’s depression caused by giving birth to a lobster-child, having sex with a midget, and finding out that her husband slept with the now dead “Hand That Rocks the Cradle” nanny.

But with McNamara/Troy relocating to LA, we were hoping to not see much of her character anyway. And look, now she’s invisible!

We wish Joley a speedy recovering from whatever it is she’s suffering from. And who are we kidding? We’re still counting the moments until Sean and Christian return to our living room.

Final Word: Nip/Tuck premiers October 30th on FX.

"Truthiness" to The White House?

For those of you who have yet to align yourselves with a presidential candidate (myself included) perhaps Stephen Colbert is your guy.

Yes, Stephen Colbert, the host of Comedy Central’s late-night political satire “The Colbert Report.”

Announcing his official run for office earlier this week, Colbert will appear on the primaries ballot in his home state of South Carolina. He will run both Republican and Democrat, giving himself the opportunity to “lose twice.”

This is hardly the first time an entertainer has set their sights on the White House. Ronald Reagan was a movie star, The Governator swept California and “Law & Order’s” Fred Thompson is currently on the Republican ballot.

But Colbert’s run has nothing to do with winning. He continues to make a mockery of the American political system, which is really just an extension of what he does on his show every night. But he does it well, so I am curious to see how long this joke will run before we get punch line.

Final Word: We generally love him. And even though chances are he will NOT be the next leader of the free world, at least it will boost his ratings!

Go Green

I have not discussed chlorophyll since my seventh grade Life Science class, but as it turns out, I probably should have paid better attention.

Chlorophyll, for those of you who may or may not remember, is the common ingredient in all green food and plants. It is an essential to all life forms in that it purifies the air and raises oxygen levels.

But eating your greens may no longer be enough. Chlorophyll—when ingested regularly in its purest, most potent form—could potentially be the secret behind a healthy metabolism and glowing skin.

We know for a fact that the flawless Julianne Moore is hooked on the stuff, so that’s reason enough for me.

One tablespoon of liquid chlorophyll, 16 ounces of water, once a day (twice if you're hardcore).

It’s pretty painless going down, but due to its color and taste I’ll coin it a Seaweed Cocktail. Hopefully it will help reverse the effects of all those other cocktails, those that have nothing to do with seaweed.

Final Word: Movie star beauty secret for less than ten bucks? I think it’s worth a try. Sunny Green Liquid Chlorophyll.

We Didn't Start The Fire

There’s nothing worse than seeing a five-year-old with a cell phone. I was at least sixteen before I went mobile. That Nokia brick....anyone, anyone? Well, times they are a-changing and little guys need to stay connected too, I guess.

Firefly has made mobile devices designed specifically for the under-ten set (the tween market is already downloading Hannah Montana ring tones onto their Sidekicks). These junior gadgets have only five keys—which means no texting—and incoming and outgoing calls are limited to only the numbers stored in their phone books (holds up to 20).

I don’t have any third-graders in my life right now, but I was thinking about distributing these phones to my friends as “going out” phones. With enough Skinny Bitches in our systems we can easily become the social equivalent of third-graders.

So much damage can be done—to former, current and future relationships—in those drunken wee hours of the morning.

Imagine being able to stay connected to your few close friends without running the risk of simultaneously ruining the rapport with your man-candy? Genius. Oh, and it glows. I believe the Firefly peeps secretly had this market in mind.

Final Word: The attached-to-the-face Blackberry as accessory du jour is becoming so passé. Get hooked up with a Firefly. You’ll thank me later.

There are other things to worry about, BUT….

I am pretty sure Herve Leger is stalking me. I don’t want to jump to conclusions or anything, but everywhere I go, he is there.

I open a magazine, he’s in every one. I skim party pictures, he’s at every soiree. And every time I walk into an Intermix—which has been quite frequently lately—he is literally shouting my name.

I finally gave into his flirtation and tried on one of those bandage dresses of his, thinking it would be totally wrong for me. But on the contrary, it was quite fantastic.

If we thought those D&G bustier numbers did wonders for our physiques, these babies are an on-the-spot nip & tuck. Talk about non-invasive! And they literally look awesome on everyone.

The only problem here is the price tag. At just under four figures, this is the last attack I need on my (practically non-existent) checking account. I could make it work, but I shouldn’t. It’s bad for my overall health. Kind of like when you’re dating a guy you know is wrong for you, but you still want to go back for more. Oh wait, I do that too.

So now that Herve has gotten my attention and is totally in my head, my friends are only making it worse. They won’t stop talking about how wonderful he is just as I am trying to forget. Bitches.

Not to mention, we have this event coming up on Wednesday (Art Rocks! hope everyone bought their ticket) and I just got word that the dress I was planning to wear is sold out in my size. And the Herve that I wanted—which is obviously sold out in every other size and color—is just hanging there on the rack. As if it were waiting for me.

Final Word: I told you he was stalking me. Now I just need to decide if it’s worth it to really indulge his advances.

Another Shot at Six-cess

It’s week three of the new NY Post’s Page Six Magazine and we can officially declare that we're into it.

We never read The Post for anything more than Page Six itself (does anyone?), so this glossy little guy gives us everything we need.

It also helps that it arrives on our doorstep every Sunday morning free of charge, but then again, who’s keeping score?

Although I am not going to go out on a limb and call this publication “smart,” it is definitely far less dumb than the salacious paper from which it sprung and most other glossies on the market.

For example, this week's cover girl is writer/actress/director, Jennifer Westfeldt. Most of us have not heard much from her since Jessica Kissing Stein appeared on DVD (for those of us who were mainstream/indie enough to catch it).

She’s beautiful, talented and intelligent (a Yale alumi). And she’s certainly not Heidi Montag, so she’s got that going for her. The inside reads weren't half bad either.

Final Word: For as long as it appears on our doorstep, we'll continue to read it. But for a mag with a troubled past, who knows how long that will be.